Menarche · a beautiful step
Your first period
A moment you remember all your life. Ideas for living it, accompanying it and celebrating it.
Share your memory
A beginning
Your first period, also called menarche, usually arrives between the ages of 9 and 16. There is no right age: every body has its own rhythm.
It can come with joy, with surprise or with a little embarrassment, and all of that is fine. What helps most is knowing beforehand what is going to happen and feeling accompanied.
If it has just arrived
If you are reading this because your period came for the first time today: welcome. Your body is growing and it is healthy.
- Breathe. It is normal to feel surprise, joy or embarrassment, all at once.
- If you are at school, ask a teacher, a friend or the school office for a pad. Lots of women carry a spare one in their bag, just for this.
- If you have stained your clothes, a sweatshirt tied around your waist sorts it out. It happens to almost everyone at some point.
- Tell someone you trust: your mum, your dad, an aunt, a grandmother or an older friend.
- At first your period can be irregular. It may take months to come back: your cycle is learning its rhythm.
If it hurts so much that you can't get on with your day, tell an adult so they can go with you to see a professional.
For families
- Talk about periods naturally, also in front of brothers and sisters.
- Call it by its name: period or menstruation.
- Celebrate without exposing her: let her decide who she tells.
- If her period is very painful or something worries you, go together to a health professional.
You can give her the cycle journal (in Spanish) so she can start getting to know herself.
Three moons to welcome it
Ideas for preparing for it and celebrating it. Ask her how she wants to live it: some want a party and some prefer something intimate.
Preparing the way
Before it arrives:
- Talk about periods naturally and without rushing.
- A kit for her school bag: a pad, a spare pair of knickers and a lovely note.
- Listen to her questions and look for the answers together.
Celebrating it
On the day it arrives:
- A special meal, like Japanese red rice (sekihan), or her favourite dish with something red on the table.
- A meaningful gift: a cycle journal, a plant, a small piece of jewellery or the book *La regla mola*.
- A simple ritual: a candle, a herbal tea, a seed to plant together.
Accompanying her
In the months that follow:
- A women's circle: her mother, grandmothers, aunts and friends tell her how they lived their first period.
- A letter to her future self.
- Look at her first cycle together on a moon calendar.
Words for your 12-year-old self
A word, or two, for the girl you were. We read them all and they grow together in the spiral.
- You are beautiful
- Ask everything
- Your body is wise
- Trust
Questions we have all asked ourselves
Does it hurt?
Some girls get a bit of tummy or back ache the first days, and others hardly notice it. Warmth helps a lot: a hot water bottle, a chamomile tea, moving gently or resting. If the pain stops you getting on with your life, tell an adult so they can go with you to see a professional.
How much blood comes out?
It looks like a lot, but over a whole period it is usually just a few spoonfuls, spread over several days. The colour can go from bright red to dark brown, and all of that is normal.
How long does it last?
It usually lasts between 3 and 7 days. In the first years your cycle can be irregular: sometimes it comes early and sometimes it takes months. Your body is finding its rhythm.
Can people tell?
Only the people you choose to tell will know. A pad worn properly goes unnoticed. And if you ever stain your clothes, it comes out with cold water. It has happened to almost all of us.
What should I use: pads, period pants or a cup?
To start with, the easiest are usually pads or period pants. The cup and tampons can come when you feel ready. Try them and stay with what makes you feel comfortable. A pad is changed every 4 to 6 hours.
Can I have a bath and do sport?
Yes. You can shower, have a bath, run, dance and do everything you love. Moving even eases the discomfort. For the pool or the sea, the most comfortable option is a cup, a tampon or period swimwear.
Why do I feel different these days?
During your cycle your hormones change, and you notice it in your energy and your mood. Maybe you feel like more calm, or you are more sensitive. Listen to yourself: your body is talking to you.
A word you don't know? Have a look at the glossary.
Do you remember your first period?
When was it, where were you, who was with you, what did you feel? I'd love to read you. With your permission, some stories will be shared on the site, without your name if you prefer.